Ok. Here we are. One week to go to the starting line. How will the 2023 Wardrobe World Cup unfold? There are some new faces, some old-stagers, and plenty of also-rans. You know who you are…… 😉
Here is a link to a private Facebook Group that we will move all chat, banter, previews and results to over coming weeks. All players from all teams should join, if possible:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/114069098357439/?ref=share_group_link
While we await the website launch from Golf Premier League, I will announce the team assignments for the 3 Pools (all drawn at random), and provide some pre-season insight to their prospects.
Pool A teams are: Grip n Sip, Drawshank Redemptions, Cockatoos, Chronic Fatigue, Angry Aardvarks, and The Back 9 Bandits.
Pool B teams are: Jug A Nauts, 40 Over, Jugheads, Par Then Bar, 3 Non Johns, and Par Tee Time.
Pool C teams are: Wuhan Warriors, Why knots untangled?, Squirrel Nation, Lynch Mob, Who’s ya caddy?, and Hosel Rockets.
Let’s start with our defending champs…. In Pool A, the Cockatoos have pulled the old switcheroo, ousting former doyen Ziggy O’Brien, in favour of some Fuzzy little bloke. Time will tell if this will help or hinder the Belligerent Budgies. They have a couple of form-horses in the stable, with Damien Plunkett (aka Plunky, aka Sid) and Joey Kelleher both in pretty good nick.
A newly formed team for 2023, Grip n Sip look pretty solid on paper. Led by the Club Champ, Jack Daniel, they bat well down the order and will trouble their Pool A opposition in the Home & Away rounds. Their roster fills out with some smiling assassins in Will Nicholls, Jimmy Owen, and Robbo Robinson. Sure, they seem like nice blokes, but watch for that grin when they stomp on your throat. Vicious. 😉
A perennial favourite, and a team of thoroughbreds :p , Drawshank Redemptions were surprised not to receive walkovers through to the playoffs, given their long and proud history and standing within Premier League circles. Despite this obvious oversight, we will soldier into the 2023 season with a strong roster, ready to pot a few Aardvarks and Cockatoos along the way. Watch for big years from the big guns, Hoppe, Sladey, Stef….. I could go on…. 🙂
They may have changed their name, but we all know that Chronic Fatigue are still all about the big bu…. putts, right? Another team that has recruited well in the off-season, this team could be a bit of a sleeping giant. Captain Tom Webb is a model of consistency, and they have some horses in the back, too, with the likes of Big Bad Benny Newton and Walshy always ready to dance when the music starts…..
A new team with a sprinkling of Wardrobe World Cup experienced campaigners, The Back 9 Bandits appear ready to launch an assault on the title. Stu Ridley leads the way, with Brendo Hocking and Truman Addison in support. A couple new names to Premier League will be tested early. We will see how the likes of Coulston, Delaney & Williams hold up in the crucible of real competition.
Last, and certainly least, for Pool A, it’s time to talk Angry Aardvarks. Don’t let the military moniker fool you, their calamitous Captain, Major Payne leads this rabble in name only. Whilst they have some Mayoral might in their ranks, the remaining combatants look a little undercooked this pre-season, and we are sadly forecasting a straight sets exit for the Agitated Anteaters in 2023. That won’t stop them chirping it up, though. They do talk a good game. 🙂
Pool B is littered with Premier League virgins, sprinkled amongst experienced teams. It looks to be a wide open race. First up, the crafty crew from Jug A Nauts look to have brought in some pinch-hitters to aid their premiership campaign. Captain Wow-Man adds Matt Sefton and Hayden Mathew’s to his experienced teammates of Ferg, Jade & Tom. This mob are all sneaky-good, and can pop in a few big scores that will surely rattle some of their foes.
Re-named for 2023, 40-Over seems an odd name for a team, but when you consider that’s their average score, it seems fair. 🙂 Shep leads this lot, with the likes of Shauny D, Theo, and Macca in support. Newcomers Garry Shep & Tom McGrath may find the going a bit hard, carrying their aforementioned teammates on their shoulders (if past years are anything to go by). If the newbies can hit the ground running, watch for quick improvement from this team as the others slipstream along towards the playoffs.
The Jugheads lineup for 2023 has a familiar feel, with Dave Ley at the helm and Tom Boyle, Alex Lord, and Woody all stepping up again. Michael Wilson & Jeff Bruhn round out this outfit, and it must be said that they bring some much needed class and decorum to this rabble. This team has some experience under its belt now and they will rightly be expecting to contend in 2023. A bit of a dark horse in Pool B, keep an eye on this lot.
The team from Par Then Bar have been around the block. They know what’s expected in Wardrobe World Cup action, and they will fire up. Scam leads the way for this year, and they have some firepower with the Franzeses, Emmo and Dan Edwards filling out their roster. There will be no easy wins against this lot, but the question remains on their playoff and finals form…. Will 2023 be their year?
Non-plussed, non-entity, non-event….. It’s hard to get excited for the 3-Non-Johns in 2023. Biffo leads the way for this rag-tag crew (don’t get him started), but they do have some depth if they can get their best games on the paddock. Watch for Duffy this year, he’s sneaky good, and Jonah Trethewie must surely fire a shot or two this year…. They will need a more consistent effort this year if they are see some finals action.
Not since my high-school chess club went on Schoolies, has a team of virgins embarked on a more ambitious task than the new crew, Par Tee Time. Untried, untested, and unaware of the banter coming their way, this band of newbs is led by Tim Roebuck. There are probably 5 blokes behind him, but I can’t see them. In his shadow you will find the likes of Crackers Cleary, Nick Roebuck, Dave Tassell and Brown brothers Ryan & Nathan. This lot are usually out with the dew-sweepers, so watch for them to post scores early and sit back with the popcorn. Welcome lads. Enjoy.
Pool C will be a tight contest in 2023. Hosel Rockets, with our sponsor Mark Tomich leading from the front, must surely make some noise at last? Will they feature in the finals? Don’t get ahead of yourselves folks…. They have a stable full of champions, but will that translate to a champion team? Big & Little Semm (you decide which is which), Huggy, and Dean & Ethan Lewis all have some pedigree, but do they have the mongrel needed to win in the clinches? They’ll be strong in the Home & Away series, no doubt. Jury is out on the playoffs and finals for now…. Let’s hope for big things.
The Wuhan Warriors have cleared quarantine and have had their vaccinations. They are ready to compete for 2023. Their dear leader, KJ Oates, has assembled a fine team of comrades for the campaign. Will his enthusiasm be contagious? Creeky, 1/2 Man McMenamin, Baz Wynd, Boz, and Clint will all need to fire in the short Home & Away season, or watch their premiership hopes disappear. Be sure to sanitise after shaking their hands.
Our fabulous Femme Fatales are back for another shot at the title. Why knots untangled is ready with a killer team for 2023. Jenny Fuaux is out front, with a strong roster in tow. Sellwood, Kirby, Nugent, Colman and Butlin have put in a big pre-season and they are ready to hand off their Wooden Spoon from last season. Watch for this team this year – I reckon they are going to be right there when the whips are cracking. Get stuck in, ladies.
Squirrel Nation (formerly Squirrel Gripped) is filled with old-stagers that know their way around a Premier League match. Cirra is the skipper for 2023, and his band of brothers are perennial performers in this competition. Nige, Mick Keys, Rowdy Mannall and Harves are all great contributors. And then there is Killa – the name says it all – this bloke is an outright weapon and will roll in putts all day to crush you spirit. If he fires up in 2023, look out for this lot.
The Lynch Mob will be on the chirp early, I reckon. Captain Scott Lynch won’t take a backward step, and Scotty Heath will let you know all about it. Ring-in Josh McFarlane is sure to be a boom recruit, and Nugget and the 2 Johns will be solid in support. I’m not sure how they will fare this year, but I’m sure we’ll hear about it. 🙂
Rounding out Pool C, the experienced team of Who’s Ya Caddy? brings their usual firepower to season 2023. Dan & Boof Lee are aided and abetted by Bernie Kelly, Brendan Schneider, Damien Shanahan and Dave Purtill. This team is like a box of chocolates…. You never know what you’re gunna get…. So let’s see how they shape up to the task.
Cheers
Mike Lane
WWC Coordinator